Tent at the Bridgehampton Polo Grounds
Someone’s gonna get these guys…
In the following weeks I’ll be hitting the Polo Tournament out in Bridgehampton. These events lure peeps that are wanting to or already living the good life. It will be crawling with gold digging slores such as yourself so the competition will be fierce. I’ll be hostessing this shindig with the BF and two of this ultra-wealthy co-workers…and they’re both recently single. If you’re smart, you’ll make a beeline for my gig. Under the tent is by invitation only, you’ll mingle with celebrities and walk off with a bitching gift bag depending on the sponsors. If you dress the part, you’ll be able to partake in the free bars set up. Usually loaded with champagne. You’ll have access to the stands of free samples. The later, the laxer it gets with a free for all right before closing up time. But for only $25 per carload of your other social climbing friends, you can park and set up your own gig next to the polo field. Everyone uses the communal port-o-potties set up there, keep in mind, so you’re guaranteed shoulder rubbing with celebs and polo players no matter what. Play your cards right and you’ll score invitations to the many parties littered around the area later that night. See archives here on how to make that happen.
You get the gist
Let’s not kid ourselves, your gig needs to be eye catching to lure those men you seek. A colorful umbrella, sheets and blankets. Add throw pillows and Mexican Indian blankets. Work your sheets over two umbrellas to make your ‘camp’. Tie weights onto the four corners of the sheets to secure them over the umbrellas. Use those dirt cheap bamboo torches as anchors for your sheeted tent, even.
Marinated, aromatic meats sizzling on your portable hibachi, made from a disposable ziti pan pre-stuffed with charcoal briquettes and wood bundles you procure from a wooded lot. You can use a disposable grill top from the dollar store or grab the grill from your toaster oven. The aroma of Mongolian beef wafting through the air is irresistible to everyone. No one is immune to chicken marinated in Italian dressing with lemon when grilling.
Unlimited beer, wine & sangria!
Men love beer so have a cooler stocked with Corona and a mini-keg of Heineken. Stock only the better beers. Wealthy men don’t drink Budweiser. Cheat and save money by loading up a pitcher of moderately priced wine, splash in a melange of fresh fruit and trade up to a “healthy” sangria. Men will appreciate this effort. Pitchers of real lemonade and ice tea appease everyone’s taste. If you’re tailgating, switch on Howard Stern’s show on satellite. Remember, men are visual so you’ll look extra appealing and friendly while laughing it up. The hostess with the mostess, heads and shoulders above the high maintenance bimbos you’re gonna be competing with at events like these well into the Fall season. Get the complete visual presentation down and let the aroma of a wood fire tug at his heart strings.
Oh…and here’s our new anthem by Steel Panther in case you need that extra added gumption. Gold Digging Whore!